Alexandra Kathryn Mosca — Exploring Life and Death: A Writer's Journey

On Easter Sunday, I find myself reflecting on the significance of this season—not only as a celebration of new life and renewal but also as a time of remembrance. Each year, I witness the mixed emotions that this holiday can bring, particularly in the lives of those who have experienced loss. For many, Easter is a gathering of loved ones, filled with laughter, warmth, and the scents of spring. Yet, for others, it serves as a poignant reminder of the empty chairs around the dinner table, of friendships left unspoken, and of the voids left in our hearts.

In my role as a funeral director, I often encounter individuals who are navigating their first Easter without a dear friend or family member. The intricacies of grief are personal and can weigh heavily during festive times. While the world outside bursts into bloom, inside, the heart may feel heavy with sorrow. Memories emerge—beautiful and painful, particularly those tied to past Easters. It’s essential to hold space for these memories, to allow them to be honored and remembered.

Consider the familiar rituals of the Easter season: the egg hunts, the family dinners, and the shared traditions that have helped shape our lives. These customs are often interwoven with the people we love. Today, as we ate dinner, my best girlfriend and I thought of one of our dear friends who died five years ago. It was he who helped our friendship grow. We also thought of a few special colleagues who taught us so much but died too soon. For families experiencing loss, these recollections can feel bittersweet—a mixture of joy for the memories and sadness for the absence.

As I talk with clients and friends during this time, I often encourage them to share their memories aloud. There’s an incredible power in speaking someone’s name, in sharing a story that brings them back to life for a moment. A simple act, like lighting a candle in their honor or placing a cherished photo at the dinner table, can create a bridge connecting past celebrations to the current reality. This acknowledgment is not just about remembering; it’s about integrating that loss into our lives. It adds depth and texture to our present experiences, allowing us to carry our loved ones forward with us as we continue to celebrate new beginnings.

Easter also invites us to contemplate renewal. Traditionally, this season is associated with hope and rebirth. As the world awakens from winter, we see nature flourishing again, reminding us that life continues despite loss. It’s easy to feel no space for renewal when grief takes hold, and yet, it’s essential to recognize that it is possible to find new paths forward even while holding the past close to our hearts.

For those grieving, I encourage the incorporation of new traditions that honor the memory of those who have passed. Perhaps it’s the addition of a new recipe that your Mom or grandmother always made for the holiday. Engaging in acts of kindness, volunteering, or creating a small memorial can add joy back into celebrations, fostering a sense of connection to the loved ones we’ve lost.

Conversations around loss are not always easy, especially during joyous occasions. We often feel the need to mask our grief or to push it aside to fit within the season’s expectations. However, it’s crucial to acknowledge that sorrow can coexist with happiness. It’s completely valid to feel heartache while also trying to embrace the seasonal joy around us. This is the complexity of being human.

As the days grow longer and flowers bloom, I often remind those in mourning that it’s okay to allow both feelings to coexist. Understand that it’s perfectly acceptable to take a moment to grieve before joining the celebration. In doing so, we honor both the joy of Easter and the memories of those who are no longer with us.

This Easter, I’ll be thinking of old friends, perhaps some of whom I’ve lost contact with over the years but who hold a cherished place in my heart. I encourage everyone to reach out, ignite old friendships, share experiences, and hold tight to the memories. This season of renewal isn’t merely about those who have passed; it’s also about the connections we still maintain and celebrate.

As we embrace the spirit of Easter, we can transform our understanding of the holiday, merging remembrance with gratitude. We can find solace in knowing that though some may no longer be present physically, they live on through the love we carry in our hearts. We honor them in our laughter and our celebrations, a testament to their impact on our lives.

This Easter, as we gather with friends and family, let’s make a conscious effort to include both memories and new beginnings in our celebrations. Let’s fill the spaces with stories of those we miss and hold tight to the love that continues to surround us. In doing so, we find comfort, community, and perhaps a renewed sense of connection.